Your Single Friends Are Not The Enemy, Or A Threat To Your Marriage
I recently read something, and I have thoughts. LOTS of thoughts. It was an article called, “Dear Married Women, Single Women Aren’t Your Enemy,” and was in response to gospel singer Kierra Sheard-Kelly who said, among other things, “I don’t care how you trust them or whatever it is, I’m very mindful and careful. I would buy a friend a hotel room before I let them stay at my house. She went on to say that, as a prayerful person, it’s equally as important for her to discern what role she should play in a friend’s need for housing.”
Oh the frustration!
It is so frustrating as a single woman to hear things like this. She’s talking about friends who probably supported her in many ways before she got married, who probably spent a lot of time and money for all the pre and wedding-day festivities, and who probably listened to her complain about said husband. In other words, the friends who have been there for her in good times and bad. But they can’t spend the night in your house because you don’t trust them? You ma’am are not a friend.
Things change but single women aren’t the enemy
When one friend gets married, and the other is single, there is no doubt things change. That’s understandable. Priorities change, schedules may be tighter, and the day-to-day interactions may not be the same. But should that mean the way you think about that single friend should change? Should you all of a sudden be suspicious of them, and not trust them to act right in front of your husband? Come on! Sounds like you never considered them a friend in the first place. Simply being single does not make them a vulture preying on your relationship.
Of my closest friends, two of them are married, and they have never not trusted me around their husbands. Nor have they ever had to worry about that because I respect them and their marriages. One of them lives out of state and I’ve gone to visit her many times and have stayed in their second bedroom. Her husband is an incredible guy who makes my friend happy. Why would I ever do anything to destroy my friend’s happiness?
As the title of the article says, single women are not the enemy of married women. Can we please change that narrative? It’s old and it’s tired. Real friends, married or single, support and trust each other. Yes, I know that there are people who have been burned by a friend, but remember, if they were really your friend, that wouldn’t happen.
So to recap…single women are not the enemy of married women. The end.
Thank you for allowing me to vent!